Thursday, August 1, 2013

I love you but...

I can not remember my last conversation with you.
I woke up this morning and tried recollecting what we had spoken the last time. I can not remember. What I remember is that you wore a grey dress with a blue belt. You decided to pin a small red flower in your hair because you were feeling adventurous. You smelled of Chanel no 5. I hated that perfume. You wore black heels and you still had to stand on tip toes to kiss me and you wrinkled your nose after that. But I can not remember the words.
I know we had cereal for breakfast. You weren't sure if it would stay down since you were in the first trimester. I coaxed you into drinking orange juice. You stuck out your tongue at me and you drank the juice. You touched my face and said something. I can not remember.
It was 20 minutes after this you left. We spoke a lot, we usually did. But I can not remember what we spoke.
I am now in a panic. I rush to the bathroom. The bottle of perfume is almost empty. I spray some into the air and take a deep sniff. I then come out to the bedroom with the bottle in my hand and go to your closet. I touch the clothes, feel the sleeve of a jacket and rub my cheek on a stole.
We spoke of happy things, our future. The baby and the new house we'd put a down payment on. Reconnecting with your father. I now remember.
Your last words were "I love you, but you smell!"


  1. I am not able to understand this post actually.
    Is this a man thinking about a woman?